Dating As A New Mom, It’s Not What You Think!
As a new mom, I expected those nights of blissful sleep to be long gone, I suspected my body wouldn’t be what it once was and I knew my life would simply never be the same. However, here is what I didn’t know…I’d be dating again! That’s right, once I became a mother, I started dating…again. Like the kind of sweat-inducing, second-guessing, should-I-send-a-text kind of dating. To be clear, I was not dating suitors – I have a fantastic husband who I just had a baby with and we are committed for life or at least till we pay off our kid’s education. I was dating moms, yes, moms!
All of a sudden, I had long days to kill between naps and feedings and I really wanted to hang out with others but I didn’t know a lot of moms or at least not ones on maternity leave. So I did what anyone interesting in making friends on maternity leave would do, I took to the internet. And in case you are wondering, there isn’t Plentyofmoms.com, but there is Peanut which is basically Tinder for moms and there is the world of mommy Facebook groups and oh there are so many!
I found a group for my neighbourhood and began to write my ‘ad’. I wanted it to be clear about who I was and my relationship goals, no flings here please! I rewrote it a few times, and then nervously pressed ‘post’: “New mom looking for other moms in the neighbourhood who like to go on walks.” Dear God, please let me get a response! I really put myself out there and I was scared! Lucky for me, I did get a response, just one. That first date, I tried to act like it was no big deal, but really it was! What should I wear? What should the baby wear? I don’t want it to look like we were trying too hard. Where should we go? A Toronto baby hotspot? A walk in the park? Oh and the stress after the ‘date’; should I text her? Should I Facebook friend her? I really liked her, but I do not want to come off too forward!
Somehow I figured it all out and, well, fast forward a few months and before I knew it I was full on mom dating! That shy uncertain mom was no longer. I was taking walks and would stop other moms to get their numbers. I would see other moms posting online looking for activities and I would invite them to hang out. Yes, I really got around the neighbourhood. I even started a work out group in my basement to meet more moms; I was getting out of control! My calendar was so jammed that I was booking dates a few weeks out.
Every once in awhile I thought to myself I should slow down, but I was being safe, you know like making sure all the babies were vaccinated. This was my time, this was my maternity leave and I wasn’t looking back! The truth is, these moms, A.K.A my League of Moms are what have made my maternity leave so amazing. I am learning from them, I am commiserating with them and yes I am dating them! Now, I need to get going, I’m off to meet my latest mom crush and I don’t want to be late!
League of Moms / 01/17/2018