5 Ways to Avoid Going Back to Work After Maternity Leave

Admit it, you have spent some time thinking about how to avoid going back to work after maternity leave.  Whether you like your job or not, we’ve all thought after it at some point because you didn’t carry a watermelon for 9 months just hand it over to daycare.  We hear you, we feel you, we are you!  So we put some thoughts together on how to avoid going back to work.   Are we missing any below?

1. Marry Rich; if you haven’t married rich, you’ll need to divorce and remarry. Make sure to only accept applicants that are rich otherwise you’ll have to start the process all over again.

2.Win the Lottery; this takes patience and some financial resources as you will need to buy tickets on the regular in order to have a chance. Also it should be noted that odds of winning are very slim but hey you can’t win if you don’t play.

3.Move: There are lots of countries where the cost of living is significantly less than in North America. However, this option may mean that you give up grandparent babysitting services so you’ll need to really think it through.

4.Put your Child to Work: It’s time that 1 year old pulled their weight, so get them to work (so you don’t have to).  You’ll have to fudge their resume a little as most workplaces do seek some experience.  Another tip; list yourself as their referral, but put your full name as mom will seem biased.

5.Have Another Baby; you will need to keep having babies if you never want to go back to work, but more kids equals more money and more problems! However, if you can have a lot of kids you may be able to get yourself a reality show (see 19 kids and counting, Kate + 8 etc.), which should then help to pay for all the kids.

Hopefully, this list made you laugh!  For those actually heading back to work after maternity leave, here are some tips for transitioning back into the workforce